Professorial Blogitude

Archive for the ‘Murderous Rampage’ Category

Grah.

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 28 June 2009

The world is against me today…
It cheered me up with the news of 2 more lbs lost, meaning I’m under a benchmark weight that I haven’t been in over a year…
But we aren’t going to make rent this month without begging more money from parents, and Firefox decided to eat all my bookmarks and force [...]

I’m Not Your Boyfriend, Baby.

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 7 April 2009

Hi again.
Sorry for my continued absence; I find it fairly hard to update a blog devoted to my teaching methods when I feel like I’m being a shitty teacher or when my students are being shitty human beings. I think it’s also a struggle for me in that I have no idea what I’m going [...]

What Professors Wish They Could Write On Your Paper: A Listing.

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 1 March 2009

Dear Students,
By now you’ve all read the carefully worded, intricate messages we professors write at the end of your papers. They often accompany a grade which does not make you happy at all, but if you read what we’ve said you’ll find the subtle justification and explanation of said grade. I’m not sure you all [...]

A Letter to Starbucks.

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 5 February 2009

To Whom It May Concern:
I’m rather upset at the way I was treated at my local store tonight; I’m a regular customer and have been for close to two years, and nearly every barista/manager who has worked at this location knows me very well. I even worked at this location for a brief time during [...]

An Open Letter To Our Administration

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 29 January 2009

Dear Heads of the Writing Department,
On my drive in this morning I couldn’t help but feel anxious and also a bit excited; today was the big day, the day you all told us in your infinite wisdom what the fuck was up with our job security (or lack thereof).  I anticipated the angst-filled room, knowing [...]

Oh, What The Fuck…

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 25 January 2009

“My grandparents didn’t take any pills, and they were fine. Just buck up and get over it. Stop being such a fucking pansy.”
-Scientologist Bijou Phillips on the subject of anti-depressants to the new issue of Paper magazine
********
Wow.
Really?
Because your grandparents (aka the elder generation) are the fucking picture of perfection in both mind and body?
Were they [...]

Buck Futters. For Real.

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 12 January 2009

My feet ache, my ankle has been rubbed raw by my damned sneaker, my thighs are thudding with pain and my back hurts inside and out (sore muscles plus horribly uncomfortable bra all day equals SAD PANDA back). My head is swimming, I feel like my semester is already in danger of sucking so much [...]

*waves*

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 30 October 2008

I’m never around, but I think that’s fairly shitty of me.
I started this blog to record my interactions with students, my feelings about teaching, etc… so I think I should keep on trucking with it.
In other words, I have grading to do and I’m avoiding it by doing other things.
I’m semi-watching “Nightmare on Elm Street” [...]

JUST

Posted by: Professor Anonymous on: 30 September 2008

SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
For the love of god and all that’s holy, please.
Shut.
The.
Fuck.
Up.


thought of the moment:

No one should die because they cannot afford health care, and no one should go broke because they get sick.

time flies.

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